Compassionate Environmentalist: Mother Earth needs fewer mothers

I already have two kids, but there’s no plan to stop. How irresponsible of me:

This week, the Optimum Population Trust (OPT), of which Mr Porrit is a patron, launched its “Stop at Two” online pledge to encourage couples to limit their family’s size.

Mr. Porritt said earlier this month: “I think we will work our way towards a position that says having more than two children is irresponsible.”

For those of us who can’t control ourselves and can’t think of anyone but ourselves, rest easy. Porritt is not advocating a compulsory limit of two children per couple, but he did say couples should “connect up their concerns with the natural environment with their decisions as prospective parents.”

I mean, come on:

“Every additional human being is increasing the burden on this planet which is becoming increasingly intolerable,” says Mr Porritt, who runs the government’s Sustainable Development Commission.

If they are that concerned about the environment, it’s a wonder they don’t abandon civilized life as we know it.

I’m a strong advocate of families, even HUGE families of three or even four kids … or more! Besides, two children doesn’t even replace the current population (which I guess is the point of this nonsense.) The global fertility replacement rate is 2.33 children per woman, which includes two children to replace the parents with a third of a child to make up for the different sex ratio at birth and early mortality.

People choose to have — and to not have — children for many different reasons, and we should all respect those personal decisions. But it’s hard for me to conceive of any case where birth is ever a worse fate for a person than nonexistence. Does the irony ever hit these global warming weirdos that they themselves are here because someone chose to give them life?

Apparently not. From the comments:

I don’t think that deciding not to have kids for the sake of the world at large is crazy at all. It’s one of the reasons we have decided not to have any children. That and the fact that we wouldn’t want any child of ours to have to endure the increasingly bleak future that is coming. These people who have 5 children – what if they each had five children etc? The world can’t sustain the people it’s already got. Having lots of children shows a lack of thought and care, in my opinion. Hannah Wilson, Cardiff

Exponential multiplication of the human race! Oh horror of horrors! And who wouldn’t rather be dead than to endure a bleak future? Thank goodness for the comedy relief of other commentors:

I have three children. I feel it is my duty to attempt to repopulate the World with intelligent individuals in an attempt to offset Mr Porritt’s stupidity. Idiocy-offsetting, kind of like carbon offsetting, just a little more immediate. Kirstine Berry, Bracknell

As the fourth of five children, I would like to take this opportunity to thank my parents for giving me a chance at life. If the guilt is just too much for them to bear, please know there is atonement for your sins.